The Flat Ass Syndrome

  by Walter Guest




Things bug me for a long time. Things that other people might consider trivial. I can’t help it. They stick in my mind.

I suppose it is an insight into my psyche that these are almost always negative things.

I can’t help it. But this blog is great therapy. I can get rid of all this negativity right here.

What’s that? I’m passing it all onto you? Now you get all my negative thoughts? Tough shit! Get a blog of your own. Pass it on to the next schmuck. Don’t come crying to me.

Anyway, I was watching this late-night show several years ago. The host shall remain nameless (Craig Kilborn). He said perhaps the dumbest thing I have ever heard. He said, “Asian women have no asses.”

I must have stared at the TV open-mouthed. That remark is so outrageous where do you begin to respond?

Forget that it is racist. If it were true, that wouldn’t matter to me. But it isn’t even close to being true. It was worst than racist, it was ignorant. Since he opened this can of worms, I shall testify.

There is no science involved in this. All is in the eye of the beholder. But I, as an observer of women’s attributes for many years, in many parts of the world, shall make a personal judgment.

Considering only nubile women there can be no question that blacks are best blessed in back. I previously wrote that my woman “would have an average ass for a black woman, but on a Thai, it is extraordinary,” (or words to that effect).

On the opposite end of the scale, the farther north you get, the flatter the ass. Nordic women, possibly relatives of the unnamed host (Craig Kilborn), have the flattest asses. This may have some relation to climate.

Thai women? In proportion they seemed to be especially endowed with derriere development. Thin women have more than their fair share. Older women retain their shape. That is unlike many races in which endowment in youth becomes a weighty problem in later life.

That is just my opinion which I would have kept to myself were it not for that loud-mouthed TV host who shall remain nameless (Craig Kilborn).




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